Attitude & Behaviour by Alok Mohan
Attitude & Behaviour
Attitudes develop during one’s formative years of life. Human Traits develop based on, what we read, what we hear & see and What we think & imagine.
These inputs are judged/evaluated by our brains on a continuous and cumulative basis and it is these values that we get from them which create and direct our attitudes. Attitudes are therefore our reactions to our experiences in addition to role played by our genetic make up in terms of “how we judge or value each experience”. A person’s attitude & behaviour keeps changing as the situation in life keeps pouring ‘inputs’ into that person. True, some traits take longer to under go changes.
Genetic level qualities too are yet stronger. That is why the system of ‘arranged’ marriages which also involves “Family background, Roots, Astrological Matching etc … has withstood as a tradition for thousands of years.
Social rules, intrinsic rules set out by cultures or groups of people, that govern interaction and communication between various ethnic groups. An Individual’s Behaviour may be considered appropriate in one ethnic group, but then the same behaviour may completely be unacceptable in another ethnic group. For example, in some families/ethnic groups it is against their conscious to eat non-vegetarian food. It is morally not acceptable to eat non-veg food, while for others it may be perfectly normal.
The Conscience therefore allows and disallows different behaviour patterns among different groups. Society has created many rules for appropriate & inappropriate behaviours. If the human society do not differentiate between appropriate and inappropriate behaviours, then there would not be any difference between the human society and the animal society ie there would be no difference between humanism and animalism.
I understand, so far Behaviour Specialists have identified three thousand Behaviour Patterns ie Traits.
To develop Positive attitude & Good Behaviour/Mannerism among children following are the tips for Parent
1. BE FIRM, CONSISTENT, AND KIND Remember the power of praise and reward. Use a positive attitude and not a punitive one in dealing with your child. Establish clear ground rules when the child is young and keep those rules with appropriate amendments. As the child matures and improves in judgment, give him more leeway.
2. LISTEN Listen actively to your child. This sets a good example and helps the child feel important and valued. Remember, if you do not want your child to tune you out, do not tune the child out.
3. DO NOT HAGGLE OR NEGOTIATE OVER SMALL THINGS — Make a clear decision. Right or wrong, it is better than haggling. .
4. GIVE CHILD CHORES — Keep the chore appropriate and keep clear guidelines as to who will do what and when. Select one or two chores and be prepared that it will also take your time. Goodwill and many calm reminders may be necessary to get those chores done. Parents who share duties and chores with their child help to build self-discipline and a sense of responsibility.
5 HELP THE CHILD REMEMBER — Many children are forgetful. Keep a short list of tasks. A list is impersonal, and the child will gain satisfaction as he checks off those tasks that he completes.
6 HELP YOUR CHILD ORGANIZE
7 AVOID FATIGUE — When children are tired, their self-control breaks down. Rest, relaxation and regular routine are particularly needed for children.
8 PROVIDE OUTLETS FOR THE RELEASE OF EXCESS ENERGY Because their energy should not be bottled up, children need daily constructive and creative activities that may include running, biking, swimming, sports, etc
9 ACCEPT YOUR CHILD’S LIMITATIONS, RECOGNIZE STRENGTHS, Un due criticism or attempts to change the energetic youngster into a “model” child, may cause more harm than good.
10 PRAISE OR PUNISHMENT MUST BE IMMEDIATE & APPROPRIATE BEHAVIORS SHOULD BE REWARDED
It is nice to be sensitive with child. But being “over sensitive” can prove other way. For instance, when you speak to him and he cries at the drop of a hat – that hidden message, from him, is: “If I cry people will sympathise me and understand that I just can’t take criticism and they won’t do it again because they know it makes me cry”
This act works very well for the child. He is controlling you in a very manipulative way.
We must reward good behaviour of a child adequately to prevent him controlling us and at the same time, we must make him understand that good behaviour do not benefit always like this but the consequences of bad behaviour are always, always “very un pleasant”
Alok Mohan
www.mqc.co.in
